


“I liked using her name as my own for a while.”

by misqueme



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, Gen, Gender Dysphoria, trans vriska
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-09
Updated: 2019-11-09
Packaged: 2021-01-26 08:51:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21371452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/misqueme/pseuds/misqueme
Summary: You needed something to call yourself, something other then what your lusus said.
Relationships: Terezi Pyrope & Vriska Serket, Terezi Pyrope/Vriska Serket
Comments: 6
Kudos: 50





	“I liked using her name as my own for a while.”

It’s a rainy day the first time you use her name.

It’d been overcast for quite a while, the clouds seemed unable to decide whether or not they were going to wreak havoc on all the poor tortured souls of Alternia.

When they finally opened up, you sat in your room and listened to the sound of the acidic substance pounding on the roof. For a moment, you let yourself hope that maybe it was burning your mom a little.

Or at least that she was suffering from being wet.

You quickly put that thought out of your mind, though— because what troll in their right mind would wish harm on their own mother?

But she chose just that moment to start screeching in your mind with her god awful powers.

_It’s horribly wet out here, insolent boy._

You chose to ignore her, although learning that the rain did bother her was a little nice.

You had tried to not think about her, to ignore the screaming in your ears and do something peaceful. A new chat client had been released, and you were gonna start using it now that you figured out how to get internet signal out here.

Well, you figured out how to hijack your neighbor’s internet signal anyway. It’s probably fine, you’re sure he doesn’t mind sharing.

On that fateful day, you sit at your husktop and you signed in with the new handle you’d created (arachnid’s grip. Like that, mother?). 

You’re not sure who to talk to. The idea of talking to someone is a lot scarier then you first realized, and you can’t just choose someone at random.

You find a memo that’s set up for gamers— FLARP, in particular. You’ve been incredibly interested in FLARP, recently, maybe you can pretend you know what you’re talking about to these people.

You pick a single handle out of the bunch and message them privately, attempting to breathe deeply as you do so. Your mother’s yelling echos in your ear. You’d much rather she didn’t do that.

arachnidsGrip [AG] began pestering gallowsCalibrator [GC] at 2:36 

AG: What’s up, looooooooser?

Okay, maybe not the best opening line. Maybe you should amend that. Pave it over a little.

AG: 8et you’re real excited to talk to someone great as me!

Ouch, way to come off as needy. You facepalm and run your fingers through your painfully short hair. You decide to once again amend the statement.

AG: I mean, I am too, so it’s totally fair.

You just left three messages for this poor unsuspecting person. God. It’s a good thing you’re so very good at talking, otherwise you would feel really bad about leaving so many words for them.

Although you still feel needy. So you decide to be gracefully patient and wait for a response.

GC: 1 W4SN’T B3FOR3 BUT 1 SUR3 4M NOW!

GC: WH4T’S UP?

You grin, one of your fangs jutting out.

AG: Nothing much, other then talking to who I assume is a fellow master of FLARP.

GC: YOU 4SSUM3 CORR3CTLY!

GC: FL4RP IS MY P4SS1ON.

GC: I’M NOT P4RT OF 4 C4MP41GN R1GHT NOW. M4YB3 1 COULD JO1N ON3 W1TH YOU!

AG: Actually?

AG: I mean. O8viously, who wouldn’t want to 8e in a campaign with me?????????

AG: I’m pretty great.

AG: We should start a campaign together!

CG: WH4T A GOOD 1D34!

CG: 1 M34N. 1 DON’T KNOW YOU TH4T W3LL. >:[

CG: 1 DON’T 3V3N KNOW YOUR N4M3.

And there it is.

You suck in a breath. You don’t know what to say. You thought it would be fun, maybe, to get to know somebody— but in your haste for contact you’d forgotten that friendship is a two-sided coin.

What to do. What to do. You’re not comfortable— not really— with someone knowing things about you.

You’re barely comfortable with your own self, let alone do you want to show that self to anyone else.

_STOP IGNORING ME, DISOBEDIENT SON._

Being stuck here with your mom is honestly bad enough.

Your eyes slide over to the FLARP book sitting on your desk. Your thoughts flash briefly to your ancestor.

Maybe... maybe you could just.

AG: It’s Marquis Spinneret Mindfang.

GC: OOO, 4R3 W3 DO1NG FL4RP CH4R4CT3RS?

GC: 1N TH4T C4S3

GC: MY N4M3 1S R3DGL4R3!

GC: 1’M 4 L3G1SL4C3R4TOR L4DY.

GC: 4R3 YOU 4 BOY OR 4 G1RL?

And the second worse possible question.

You rub your fingers over your eyelids, letting your pupils bore into the screen.

It’s almost like you can feel your mom’s disappointment boring into you. Your hands shake as you press your fingers into the worn keyboard and type.

Once you say this, you can’t take it back.

AG: The Marquis is a girl!!!!!!!! O8viously!

GC: OH, OF COURS3. 

GC: YOU KNOW 1 H4D 4 F33L1NG!

GC: YOU’R3 PR3TTY OBV1OUSLY A G1RL.

You bite your lip, holding back a smile, and successfully ignoring your Mom’s screams for the first time.

AG: Duhhhhhhhh. Glad you can see past the end of your nose, Redglare!!!!!!!!

GC: >:]

GC: 1 H4V3 PR3TTY GR34T 3Y3S1GHT.

AG: Let’s start planning the 8est campaign ever!

GC: D3F1N1TLEY!

——————

It’s half a sweep later when the question is revisited.

You ruffle up your hair, realizing you kinda look like a ran-over purrbeast. But at this point you don’t care. You’re way, way too happy about the length.

Your husktop beeps loudly and you turn to look at it. Your mom’s quiet. She’s been quiet this week.

GC: 4R3 W3 4LMOST R34DY?

You walk over, listen to your high-heeled boots click satisfyingly on the floor. 

AG: Yep!!!!!!!!

AG: 8ut, 8efore we meet in person today, Terezi,

AG: There’s something I want to tell you.

GC: >:0

GC: WH4T 1S 1T?

AG: Well, It’s my name!

AG: I know you’ve 8een on the eeeeeeeedge of your seat waiting to learn it.

GC: 1 H4V3!

AG: :::;)

AG: My name is Vriska.

AG: Vriska Serket.

You smile, for real, and it feels right.

GC: 1 LOV3 1T!

GC: TH3 NAM3 SU1TS YOU.

AG: I know, right?

GC: 1T’S N1C3 TO M33T YOU, VR1SK4 >:]

You nearly bite your lip to blood from how hard you’re smiling. It’s probably ruining your lipstick.

AG: Yeah. It is.

**Author's Note:**

> i dont know anything about being trans so please let me know if any of this was inaccurate or disrespectful!
> 
> hope you enjoyed <3


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